i pity people who get satisfaction in criticizing other people's faith. they just won't stop until they convince you or degrade you by making you feel that they are walking at the perfect path and that you are taking the wrong way. i personally believe that God is good and merciful... and whatever religion or cult one would like to belong to, the true measure of faith is action and not just spreading the "word" by preaching. actions powered with pure intentions plus eradication of pretensions... is a true miracle which would make people from all walks of life and from different religion believe that we are all praying and glorifying one superior being. i met alot of people who made me fortunate in learning that there is more than just preaching. i remember i met a company ceo who preaches about faith in hesua's name, but abuses his employees by not paying them on the days they came to work (isn't that a work of evil). i met another who told me she is under the blessing of yahweh which made her "complete" but ironically she never got satisfied with how she looks and she is always insecure. another prays at church all the time singing praises, but at home curses neighbors and his children.

nobody can quote me bible verses because i made chants and spells which God already granted. who said witchcraft is evil... candle burning which is done in churches and worship halls originated from witches who are originally nature lovers and protectors. worships and prayers are synonymous to chants and spells respectively and another commonality these things shared with each other is the strict need of "pure intention" without the infliction of pain to another person.

- anybody who never sinned can cast the first stone at me - =)

hay kakapagod ang araw na ito. masarap magshopping kaso nakakainis ang trapik sa pilipinas!!! hindi pa man nobyembre, masikip na ang tutuban at divisoria. cguro natuto na ang mga tao na pagtapak ng nobyembre lalu na yung huling linggo nito ay napakasikip sa pasilio ng mga bargain malls sa divisoria. nagtataka ako kung ang mga stalls ba duon ay nagbabayad ng buwis samantalang wala naman silang ibiniggay na resibo kasama ng mga pinamili mo. mas nagtataka ako kung napapakinabangan ba ng pilipinas ang micro retail businesses na ito eh samantalang parang di sila nagbabayad ng tax. hmmm ewan ko kung masasabing hindi ako epektibong pinoy dahil sa pagsuporta ko sa mga ganitong pamilihan kung saan mura nga ang tinda dahil walang patong na tax. maihahanay din ba ako sa mga walang wentang mamamayan sa tuwing namimili ako sa tutuban at divisoria??? sa aking palagay ay hindi no... matalinong mamimili lang ako. eh tutal nagbabayad naman ako ng tax bilang call center employee eh di ibabawi ko nalang yung mga tax ko sa pagbili ng mga bargain retail clothes. malaki tlaga ang tipid sa divi at tutuban, pede kapa tumawad! pero naawa rin ako sa mga salesladies tuwing humihingi ako ng bawas kasi baka nababawasan din ang kumisyon nila.

mahirap talaga mamimili lalo na kung limitado ang budget... pero dahil sa tutuban at divisoria yung gagastusin mo sa pagbili ng isang slocks na presyong P500 sa sm/rustans/robinsons at sosyal na pamilihan ay makakabili ng 3 slocks (at P150 each) may sukli kapang P50 = pambili ng palamig (orbitz @ P35) habang nabuburo ka sa trapik pauwi + pamasahe (P15 para sa 2x sakay)

red monday

i really love anything red except roses. today i finally held the bpi credit card i have been waiting for and it is firing red in color. i am no chinese but i always feel and mostly believe that my inclination to red gave me good lucks. they often say that it is lucky to wear something red on a monday (i also tried wearing a red underwear on a monday!).... well i bet it is true, i already have it in my system. i even got so lucky that i received my red bpi card on a monday. additional info... for soul magnets (those who usually see spirits and those who dont like seeing them or attracting them) old people say that wearing red will shoo them away. why not try it, i think it worked for me once ahhooooo.

by the way, last night i had coffee with 2 of my college friends. one is on her med internship whie the other works in a call center and is actually convincing me that we pursue law school (pede, kasama yan sa plans ko.. kaso ipon muna). tomorrow, it will be mechanical engr board... and hopefully by the end of the week there will be good news for my bro who will be taking it. good luck to him and may the positive forces be with him. my sister who passed dental board this year advised him to wear (guess what) something red during the boards!

for the addiction to onepiece and for the love of butch villaflores

this friday will be payday again but i just had my pevious pay 2 fridays ago. ahhh i just love working in an american cultured company just because of two good reasons, good compensation and an every other friday payday. (makes me look forward for this friday and savor my last week's expenses. ) i have planned my expenses and savings ahead coz now that 1st semester is almost over aside from worrying about my grades, i still need to worry about my tuition fee for 2nd sem. the supreme geing is so good and nature is well balanced because just when i never expected it, surprises and blessings would come in great packages and would be delivered just at the perfect timing. therefore come next week my needs and wants will be well satisfied.

another transaction for onepice vcd episodes is scheduled this coming friday (this is just too addicting). and who said addiction is bad??? addiction is so good as long as the means justify the ends, kaya nga i learned strict budgetting of my moolah bcoz of my addictions. addiction had made me imposed strict discipline on myself in terms of spending my moolah and even about quitting yosi! it just so happened i got addicted to something so good which made me quit my bad habits. hahaha for my addiction to onepiece i gave up smoking to save some bucks so i can complete the onepiece series.

enjoying the fruits of my labor will be incomplete if i won't share it to the my family and of course to my amaranth love. of course part of what i sow will be given for home expenses which is not much, but it's better some than none. of course part of it goes for foodtripping with ma eyeofv (kaya lumulobo kami pareho lalo na ako). dadala rin ako kahit konting barya kahit ayaw nya ako pagastusin, buti na yung siguraro.

(sigh!) sana fridays na...

for my addiction of onepiece and for the love of butch villaflores, just can't wait for friday. on a friday i really am inlove and addicted hahahaha.

done with last day of work, hello days off. this week's totally worth all the hard work. i just hope that i will have good rating for my research proposal which is just a repetition of a scientific paper published. i adapted the idea for experimentation in the philippine setting. i titled it "a research for utilization of algae spirogyra for biosorption of common dyes used in the philippine textile industries".

as per work week recap, we had meeting with hr regarding our separation pay computation. yup, management is already bought by another aspiring call center biz in the philippines. alot of employees were hoping to get big bucks but personally my point is "better some than none!". in the first place we were told even before the new contract signing that the separation pay was a blur. so thanks to nature coz prayers about financial needs were granted.

too much positive expectations sometimes turn things into total diappointment. minsan tama nga yung ika ng nakararami "sabayan nalang ang agos ng buhay!"

welcome back to me!!!

i was sooo busy. for the past 9 months all i did was work, school, and a bit of play. there was some available time to check stuffs online, but never had a time to think good posts for my blog. sorry to mah readers who might have gone bored visiting my site since there's nothing here to appreciate hehehe.

well at least i found time today, coz im done with requirements for school. hopefully i will be finding more available time to post.

carry on!

HELLah 2005

And i thought wrong! I was totally wrong when i expected that 2004, since it's the year of the monkey (which happens to be my sign), will be a more positive year for me.

The mid and last part of my 2004 was the worst of both. I regretted celebrating 2 of the most celebrated days in my life. First, MY BIRTHDAY... Second, CHRISTMAS. When evil decides to mess your day, it won't choose a timing perfect for us but of course perfect for the evil's goddamn ass.

During my birthday last July 2004, my mom and i argued just because i told her that i never felt i was my birthday. All the food i would have eaten and the utensil i would have used that time were unavailable for me to consume and use, respectively, just because my dad's friends who were already having the time of their lives drinking were being prioritized. That day, I went off early from the office; hurried fast home; and even told my boyfriend that day to starve until we get to my place so that it would save us some money from eating out and of course to celebrate my much awaited 24th bday with my "family". Dammit, when we arrived home... it wasn't i who was supposed to enjoy the party but my dad's friend who was also celebrating his bday. PUCHA ISINABAY LANG PALA AKO... So i got mad, asked my bf out so that I could cool down... After 3 hours of a counseling session with my bf, since he was trying so hard to bring back my mood by some logical and smart conversation, we went back home. AKALA KO OKEY NA?! There my mom went up to my room and threw words at me, especially quoting, "Naiinis ako sa BF mo, galit ako sa kanya... at ikaw kinakampihan mo pa!!!" Oops, ano daw? And there it started, I answered back to defend my side until i heard the destructive statement of the day "YOU DONT CARE AFTER ALL!" Boom, i packed my things rushed downstairs to leave home. However my good'ol neutral BF stopped me and cleared my mind by his "spirituall" advices. Of course, I DIDN'T ACCOMPLISH MY FLIGHT!

Christmas came, 7 months after my disastrous bday! This time my dad was the one who threw me the same words my mom told me during my bday. He despised my BF bcoz according to him "ANG YABANG NG BF MO!" Damn, what's so arrogant about him washing the dishes after the family's dinner, what's so arrogant about being discreet and gentle, and what's so arrogant about having nothing to be arrogant at all? I didn't know why i became the subject of that Christmas day, but one thing i knew i've done right.... I SUCCEEDED IN MY FLIGHT! I ran away from home for about 2 weeks. It was damn painful... how their words ripped and broke me and my heart apart.

I am at home but i can never say I am Home. There is an ongoing silent war. They wanted me here, yes indeed i can be here physically but my being is somewhere else. A place where i can be accepted, a place where i can be who i am, a place where there is tension but is settled because communication is open. I AM IN HAVEN, the AMARANTH HAVEN.

Hello 2005, i hope that my hello is worth every effort and will not be a HELLAH (hell of) 2005.

This might be late for the Philippine celebration of new year but Happy New Year to all bloggers! Well on second thought, it will still be an advance greeting for the Chinese celebration of new year hehe.